Outbursting thoughts | Part-1

It is 2:44 AM. My body is lying on the bed inside a locked room in a 33-story high-rise building, and I'm with my soul and skin intact, trying to figure out what my little brain is thinking.

It's a thought or a line of thinking described in Don't Believe Everything You Think by Joseph Nguyen, or perhaps it's the 1st or 2nd system defined by Daniel Kahneman in his book Thinking, Fast and Slow. I'm not entirely sure, but at this moment, I could have slept. Instead, my little brain is racing at high speed.

You might wonder what all this nonsense is, but yes, it does happen. It showers a warm wave of heat onto my heated skin, bringing me to misery.

Is it a problem with my brain, or is there some energy surrounding me, or maybe inside me, that induces these thoughts? Is it this energy that calls my brain to think, crave, and dig up the buried soul?

The soul, which I buried in some unidentified area within me, gets unearthed by my brain, prompted by an invisible source of energy.

The thoughts are purely illogical because it's a buried past, and I know it. I know thinking about it is entirely wrong. However, I ask a second entity in my soul or brain, "Only for today, then I won't think." I feel as if my brain, soul, or some energy feels relieved, but it starts tormenting me again, reminding me of losses, miseries, guilt, and sacrifices.

Considering these activities, I sometimes feel like living with these energies and slowly, gently extracting the necessary essence, mixing it with mine, and channeling the energy towards a purpose. Even if the soul is unearthed, I bury it again with a smile, crafting a more robust form of my soul.